You're all Posers:


 
If you...
Bolt every chrome do-dad you can find onto your bike
You're a poser.
 
If you...
Strip off all the chrome 'cuz you don't want people to think you're a poser
You're still a poser.
 
If you...
Wash your bike 'cuz you don't wanna be seen on a dirty scoot
You're a poser.
 
If you...
Never wash your bike 'cuz you like it looking ridden,
Then you're a poser too.
 
If you...
Garage your scoot and only bring it out for special events
You're a poser.
 
If you...
Stand next to your odometer and brag about high mileage, guess what?
You're a fucking poser.
 
If you...
Go to every HOG event and say "Look at all the damn posers."
You're just as much a poser as they are.
 
If you...
Boycott HOG events 'cuz you don't wanna be seen hanging with posers
You're an antisocial poser.
 
If you...
Keep your bike completely stock to retain its classic style
You're a cheap poser.
 
If you...
Repeatedly tear your bike apart to add yet another 1 to 3 horsepower,
You're an anal-retentive poser.
 
If you...
Bolt on billet parts and fancy fenders and bullet running lights
You're a poser
 
If you...
Fabricate all your tin in your garage 'cuz only posers bolt on billet
You're not only a poser, you're a snob poser.
 
If you...
Ride a Japanese Cruiser or a California Custom 'cuz it "looks" just like a Harley
You're a traitor poser.
 
If you...
Refuse to ride anything but a Genuine Harley, and wouldn't be seen on Jap Crap
You're a loyal poser.
 
If you...
Chop and flame 'cuz it looks cool
You're a poser.
 
If you...
Look down your nose at those riding rice
You're a bigot poser.
 
If you...
Wave at anybody... ever.
Guess what? You're a poser.
 
If you...
Trailer your bike to bike events.
You're a lazy poser.
 
If you...
Wear a t-shirt that says "I rode my bike to trailer week."
You're really a poser in disguise.
 
If you...
Take your bike into the shop for every little oil or lamp change
You're a pansy yuppie poser.
 
If you...
Perform all the labor on your bike yourself and then brag about it
You're an arrogant greaseball poser.
 
If you've ever...
Looked down your nose at any body, for any reason,
Then you're the worst kind of poser of all.
 

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